White Comanche (1968)

comanche pic copy

Title: White Comanche
CinemaBandits Title: Capt. Kirk Just Says 'No' To Peyote!

CinemaBandits Reveiw: White Comanche is right... more like Extremely Pale White Comanche! Could the director have picked a more 'white' dude than William Shatner to play an Indian??!?

Capt. Kirk, in all his Northern European'ness, pulls double duty in this stinky burrito. He plays both Notah and Johnny Moon... twin American Indians separated by the love of the peyote.

Seems Notah Moon (bad Shatner) is addicted to the stuff and can't stop murdering people. Which is a real drag to his brother Johnny Moon (good Shatner)... he keeps getting blamed for it. Well, Johnny has had it... telling his twin brother to meet in the town of Hondo for a showdown!

Unfortunately, the producers must have run out of money by the end, because the much anticipated showdown never really happens. A couple of Shatners ride by each other... there's a squirt of blood... one falls off... the end.

But none of that matters!

The truly memorial moments from White Comanche are delivered by William Shatner himself... in all his understated acting glory! Imagine the cinematic conflict, if you can, of good Shatner in a cowboy hat staring into a mirror... only to see bad Shatner in war paint staring back! They say conflict 'drives' plot. If that's true... this plot just won the Indianapolis 500, baby!

Imagine stupefying lines of dialogue delivered by Shatner like "His liver is white like his Yankee father. His heart burns blacker than the skin of his Comanche mother. His white belly, like his name, a snake.".

What the heck does that mean??!?

Who cares!

It's William Shatner saying it... and then he pulls out a gun and shoots some people.
Funky Burrito Rating:burrito4burrito4 (2 of 10) Funky Burritos.

For all of you who don't want to sit through White Comanche...
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